Uwe Boll Goes Postal on Indy 4, Spielberg

Uwe Boll is confident.  

Madcap auteur Uwe Boll, known for such critical and box office disasters as Bloodrayne 2: Deliverance and In the Name of the King, has announced that he is releasing his next epic, Postal, on May 23rd, the same date as Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. And this is no accident. He’s doing this as a direct challenge. BloodyDisgusting has the quotes:

“On the Indiana Jones weekend - May 23 - we will go out and destroy Indiana Jones in the Box Office! We all know that Harrison Ford is older as my grandpa and his time is up - would Michael Moore say!…Spielberg gets sloppy. We saw that with War of the Worlds (why the fuck the older brother survived?) and also in parts of Jaws, E.T., Munich etc.! My performance in Postal as ‘Nazi Theme Park Owner’ outperforms easily Ben Kingsley in Schindler’s List!“

Okay. I guess the only question is what can Paramount do to confront this menace? They can’t afford a poor opening weekend for as big a film as Indy 4 but can they move the date at this time? Do they want to move away from the blockbuster Memorial Day weekend? Here’s what Spielberg is facing in Postal:

Living on Social Security and unemployed, DUDE desperately seeks employment, but instead finds a life of violent action and adventure when he teams up with his UNCLE DAVE, a financially strapped cult leader, in an effort to rip off an amusement park, only to find that the Taliban are trying the same heist simultaneously.

You can see how these might appeal to similar audiences.

Oh, all right, I’m just being sarcastic. Look, Boll might not be able to make a comprehensible movie, but he makes for good copy and at least he’s having some fun.