Eva Mendes Interested in Bad Lieutenant (the movie, that is)

Eva Mendes is apparently doing something in The Bad Lieutenant but I’m not sure what.

Variety has news that Eva Mendes is in talks to join the cast of Werner Herzog’s remake of Abel Ferrara’s The Bad Lieutenant. Nicolas Cage is already set to star in the role made famous (or infamous) by Harvey Keitel.

The original was about a corrupt cop (get it? Bad Lieutenant, you see) who gets involved in the investigation of the rape of a nun. Would Mendes be playing the nun? Let’s check the cast of the first film and play “match that actress.” Let’s see, I have heard of exactly one of the actresses in the IMDB credits for the 1992 movie and that one is Stella Keitel, who played the “Lieutenant’s Daughter,” and was probably about eight at the time. And the only reason I’ve heard of her is because, well, she’s Harvey Keitel’s daughter. Okay, there aren’t many women in the movie and I can’t tell how big any parts are. So I have no idea what Eva’s doing in this movie. She’d be a hard sell as a nun, though.

Before any of that even gets started, I guess I should mention that Ms. Mendes will be next seen in Frank Miller’s The Spirit and the remake of the 1939 classic The Women. Okay, I just watched the trailer for The Women and guess what? This version isn’t in any danger of becoming a classic. First off, it seems like the stylist decided to give everyone the worst possible hair they could have. Second, Meg Ryan is totally miscast in the Norma Shearer role. Meg Ryan the ageing perkey girl next door stepping in for Shearer’s grande, gracious society dame? It doesn’t even make sense. Was everyone else not available? Third, for a movie that was known for its claws out bitchy wit, this version seems woefully low on cleverness. Finally, Eva Mendes looks great in the Joan Crawford role of the department store salesclerk on the make, but she doesn’t have Crawford’s desperation and hardness. Then again, who does? Sigh… What a debacle. Why did they make this? I’m going to have to clean my eyes out by watching some Turner Classic.